Emotional needs that your partner cannot meet

Humans are social beings, wired to live in a community and make sure that their needs and wants are met inside the community. But with the changes in the way the communities are planned these days, we often are made to live on our own. This means that we must meet the needs and expectations we have on our own. However, when we are in a relationship, we want our needs to be met by our partner. “It is important that we do have our needs met by our partners (that's the point of a relationship). I'm saying we cannot expect our partners to meet all our needs, and some emotional needs specifically are our own responsibility,” wrote Psychotherapist Israa Nasir as she emphasised on the need of meeting our own needs ourselves.

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Israa further listed down a few emotional needs that our partner cannot meet, and we should not expect them to, too. They are, as follows:

Understanding: Understanding what we are going through and agreeing with ourselves and our thoughts – that is not something that a partner will agree on at all times. And we should not become impatient with that as well.

Wholeness: A partner can make us feel complete in a relationship, but the sense of wholeness must come from within and only we can make ourselves feel that.

Growth: Our growth solely depends on ourselves, and our partner cannot help us with it. They can ensure to make a safe space for us to growth, but that’s all that they can do.

Confidence: The confidence and the trust that we have in ourselves depend on us. The partner cannot help us with it as well.

Self-love: No matter how good a relationship we are in, we should always learn to put ourselves first and love ourselves no matter what. Only when we love ourselves, do we learn to love others better.