How to express emotional needs in a relationship: Psychologist shares tips

In relationships, we often do not feel that we are understood enough. It is also healthy in relationships to put forward the needs and wants we have, so that the other person can have realistic expectations from us and vice versa. It also takes a lot of efforts in a relationship to meet the expectations and the emotional needs of the other person. While a relationship is mostly about a lot of work and effort from both ends, it becomes lot easier when we are able to express the needs we have, and can ask the person to fulfill the same.

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Addressing this issue, Psychologist Nicole LePera wrote, “It’s important that we practice learning how to communicate them if we want to have healthy relationships. Our partners can’t mind read. They shouldn’t “just know” what we want. We’re responsible for voicing what we want. While also being curious about our partner's needs.” She also stated a few tips that we can follow in order to express our emotional needs in a healthy way:

Informing: When we go through a fight or flight state in a relationship, it is important to inform the other person about it so that they can understand the phase we are going through and give us the required space to regulate our emotions.

Expressing: When we understand the triggers we have, we can ask the partner to help us through the same.

Conflicts: In case of conflicts, we often need reassurances that we are still together in the relationship. We should ask the other person to give us the assurances so that we do not fall in the trap of overthinking.

Hobbies: Taking time out for ourselves to just do what we like, without involving our partners is also a way of self-love which is important in a relationship.

Time: In case we need time to process the emotions, we should be open about it to our partners.

Physical touch: For some people, physical touch acts as a reassurance of love and companionship.

Communication: In relationships, it is very important to be on the same page about finance, values and plans for future.