7 big relationship mistakes couples make and how to avoid them

Being in a committed relationship can be one of the most fulfilling and rewarding experiences in life, but it's not without its challenges. Despite the best intentions, many couples make mistakes that can lead to frustration, hurt feelings, and even the end of the relationship. From failing to communicate effectively and ignoring each other's needs to taking each other for granted and letting jealousy take over, these mistakes can undermine the foundation of even the strongest relationship. By understanding these mistakes and learning how to overcome them, you can strengthen your bond with your partner and build a lasting, fulfilling relationship together. So, let's dive in and discover the some common big mistakes couples make and how to avoid them. (Also read: 12 signs of a healthy partner you should look for in a relationship )

Common mistakes couples make in relationships:

Todd Baratz, a popular psychotherapist and relationship expert, shared some of the most common mistakes couples make and how to avoid them, in his recent Instagram post.

1. Lack of tolerance

No one is perfect and no relationship is perfect. All relationships have aspects that are unsatisfying. Rather than trying to force change or spiral out because you think you're with the wrong person, accept your partner's limitations and invest in the aspects of your relationship that are actually satisfying.

2. Stop obsessing about needs

You don't need everything you think you do. The expectations and entitlements about needs are likely ruining your capacity to enjoy what your partner has to offer. Get needs fulfilled by friends, other partners, family, and most importantly yourself.

3. Prioritize life beyond your relationship

Don't make your relationship your entire life. Invest in a variety of activities and people to find fulfilment. This will prevent conflict or disappointment from feeling like the end of the world, and give your relationship some breathing room.

4. Stop the blame

Blaming your partner relinquishes your power and keeps you trapped, making your happiness dependent on their ability to change. It's important to take responsibility for your own actions in difficult situations, as this can bring about change in the relationship. By acknowledging your power to change yourself, you can positively impact the dynamics of your relationship.

5. Stop expecting effortless desire

Desire isn't a naturally occurring substance that is self-sustaining. You have to do things to stimulate desire and understand the relational dynamics that often contribute to its decline or complete absence. Cultivate desire if you are to sustain it.

6. Avoiding therapy

Go to couples counselling before conflict gets out of hand. Relationships that proactively seek support thrive. From the beginning build in a structure of relational reflection and learning, whether through couples counselling or a couples book club. Learn about how to show up better in relationships together. Do something!

7. Take responsibility for triggers

You're triggered more than you realize and are reenacting something from childhood. All intimate relationships contain aspects of a reenactment from unresolved childhood issues. Your reactivity is connected to these early experiences and your present relationship. The more you're able to invest in and take responsibility for the triggers and the frequency with which you react, the more satisfying your relationships will become.