Valentine's Day 2023: Soul compatibility in love relationships

Have you ever thought of what makes a relationship compatible? Forget about the astrological synastry, the financial and social statuses, even the sexual chemistry. Yes, you heard that right! Make no mistake, sexual compatibility is important, but when we talk about marriage and a solid long-term future, there is another aspect you need to consider as sex, no matter how good or important, tends to be put on the backburner when it comes to working on an inspired future together. We are talking about spiritual compatibility which is a definite pre-requisite for a healthy marriage because in relationships that are cemented with a mutual desire to understand the divinity within, there occurs the divine alchemical marriage of souls or what the Alchemists termed Hieros Gamos, the wedding of a God and a Goddess.

When there is no spiritual compatibility in a romantic relationship, life can indeed become volatile, combative and so so stressful. A couple not grounded in spiritual love can drain one another of their strengths without building upon them. Someone who really loves you will recognize and acknowledge your power; your strength and they would invest time and energy in aiding you to develop them to fruition. Your strengths shouldn’t intimidate your partner, rather it should inspire them. This is what a thriving relationship looks and feels like, and is a solid indication that you guys are spiritually compatible.

We spoke about strength, and now we need to address weaknesses for in this world of duality everything has a polar opposite, like the north and the south pole and weaknesses are mostly ignored because we tend to focus on the positive at the onset. But weaknesses need not be a hindrance or an avoidance issue, but it needs to be tackled as areas which need improvement. You have to realize and acknowledge this in a relationship, for we humans are fraught with weaknesses, it is a commonality of the human condition.

A spiritually compatible couple will not disrespect or ridicule their individual weaknesses, they will take authorship of the situation and work on what’s holding their partner back. When two people put their heads together in mutual love and respect, there is profound growth with regards to solving any problem. For instance, if your partner is not a good listener, then you make sure to listen to them. Let them realize that you’re a good listener and slowly they will start to listen. It may sound obtuse, but it definitely works. If your partner is suddenly thrust in a leadership role and they’re not confident about their leadership skills, then you need to step up and display the qualities of a true leader. Once they see your confidence, feel your influence and authority, they will begin to embody those traits. You might be thinking that, “I need to sharpen those leadership skills, so when I’m not perfect how can I help my love”? But listen to this, “perfection doesn’t exist. With each moment, all we can hope to do, is do our best! Just do your best and “impossible is nothing!

If your partner has stress, then work on this by joining a yoga class together and take forty-five minutes every day to just breathe and practice self-affirmations together. Watch how both your lives change!!! When you’re faced with an obstacle, then join together as a team and figure out a way to solve it. There is no point in personal attacks, gaslighting or playing on psychological triggers because these lead to an unhappy union. Let go of all these emotional villains and surrender to the beauty of one another’s souls!

When this sacred surrender happens, a safe space is created from which arises physical, mental, emotional and spiritual bonding and it’s bonds that keep us together. When a woman delivers a baby and suckles the child, her brain releases dopamine and this dopamine is considered to be the bonding chemical. Spiritual couples tend to bond on dopamine, not just serotonin that leads to great sex and fun experiences, but does not bond couples for the long term.

We create strife and disharmony through mental projections and the act of transference because when we project our own ideas and expectations onto our lover without acknowledging their needs, we’re cooking up a recipe for disaster. Transference happens when we “transfer” our own negative emotions onto our partner. For instance, if you’re sexting on social media with someone, you become jealous and possessive of your partner. You tend to think they’re cheating when they laugh at a meme on their screen. You are transferring your own guilt, shame and anger at someone who is totally innocent. How do you think they’d respond? Think of how you would respond if the tables were turned and you become the victim of transference. It doesn’t paint a pretty picture, does it?

Twinflames help us realize our life’s purpose and goad us in that direction no matter how uncomfortable we get. However, everyone is not blessed with the luck to meet their twinflames, so then what can be done? I’ve always believed that finding your life’s purpose is the central motif of self-development and without finding it one never really can surrender spiritually in a relationship.

We see this happen with many artistic types. They fall in love with someone and then they outgrow them as their visions, goals and outlook change. They become a completely different person after discovering their life’s purpose and often their partner who has not walked through the “fires of the nine hells”, gets left behind.

If you want something long-term, then work on discovering your own purpose and then help your lover discover theirs. When two people work towards a common goal and their purposes are aligned, their relationship can withstand any storm and only be strengthened by it. Let us try to understand this better.

For instance you’re a dancer/actor and you land up with someone who thinks dancing/acting are in some form frivolous, derogatory or superfluous and scoffs condescendingly every time you go for practice or an audition, it’s time to skip this torture. Don’t you see this will never work even though you agree to “compromise”! Compromise has become an ugly word indeed as if in some way it’s a Faustian bargain, but it needs not be.

Maybe they are business minded and want you to get a nine to five job, but you’re a massage therapist, then this is a combination for disaster. You need to find someone whose ideology is aligned with yours or else you’ll never be able to achieve peace and bliss. Love outgrows the honeymoon phase and mutates or transforms into something ugly or something beautiful. But beauty and domestic bliss can only be achieved if your interests, wants and needs are in harmony. Your vibrations need to be aligned, without which there is no long-term. Just remember, the right person will never take you away from the divine! What is the divine, you ask? Well, it’s none other than YOU!