Opting out of parenthood? Study says, it has something to do with your parents
The study observed a direct link between our attachment patterns with our parents with the decision of having a child.
Were you emotionally distant from your parents as a child? Do you still feel disconnected from them today? According to a recent study, the nature of our early emotional attachments may significantly shape how we view parenthood. In particular, the study suggests that the choice to remain childfree could stem from the emotional bonds that we did or did not experience with our parents. Also read | Healthy parenting 101: Psychologist shares valuable tips to help your teen with emotional regulation
Published in the Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, the study found a strong link between one’s attachment style and their intentions around having children. Specifically, individuals who felt emotionally distant from their parents were more likely to choose a childfree lifestyle. Their reasons often included a desire for personal freedom, concerns about mental health, and the pursuit of individual goals. In contrast, people with anxious attachment styles, those who feared abandonment or craved closeness, were more inclined to want children.
Findings of the study:
Researchers analysed data from over 18,000 adults across the globe, with more than half of the participants based in the United States. Participants completed a detailed questionnaire designed to assess their attachment patterns with key figures in their lives, including their mother, father, romantic partners, and close friends. They were also asked about their future parenting intentions, whether they planned to have children or preferred to remain childfree. Also read | Year-ender 2024: Parenting trends in the digital age that redefined family life
Those who chose to remain childfree were asked to explain why. About two-thirds cited a desire for personal freedom as the primary reason.
Sara Glass, a PhD student at the University of Illinois Urbana-Champaign and the lead author of the study, told PsyPost, “Most childfree people said that they didn’t want to have children because they wanted to keep their freedom and because having kids just isn’t compatible with their lifestyle or goals. Other common reasons were being worried about the state of the world and the environment, financial reasons, career-related goals, fear of losing personal identity, mental health concerns, and simply not liking children or only liking them in small doses.”
The researchers concluded that the emotional dynamics between a person and their parents, especially the mother and father, are critical indicators in shaping decisions about parenthood. Individuals who were avoidantly attached (emotionally distant or dismissive) were significantly more likely to opt out of having children. Conversely, those with anxious attachments were more likely to want children, potentially as a way to create emotional closeness or fulfill unmet attachment needs. Also read | Parenting tips: Truths to remember while raising secure and resilient children
Note to readers: This article is for informational purposes only and not a substitute for professional medical advice. Always seek the advice of your doctor with any questions about a medical condition.
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