Facing post-marriage depression? Expert explains why it happens, tips to manage

Be it marriage or a romantic relationship, after the initial honeymoon phase is over, that’s when real life starts. And relationships, just like real life, demands a lot of work, efforts, sticking by ach other no matter what and trust. But that’s not always how it looks like.

Married life carries the burden of many unrealistic expectations that are constantly fed t us through films, society and social media. And this can lead to mounting feeling of hopelessness and falling behind. Also read | Unmarried people more depressed? Study reveals why singles are at higher risk

In an interview with HT Lifestyle, Ankita Kaul, founder of Wifeyytalks said, “Post-marriage depression is a very real issue and often stems from unrealistic expectations set by society, films, and social media. Marriage isn’t always roses, date nights, or constant laughter. It’s a decision, a commitment, and most importantly, work. Many couples face post-marriage depression due to unmet fantasies, lack of boundaries, and being unprepared for such a massive life change.”

Causes of post-marriage depression:

“Women commonly struggle with a loss of freedom, mismatched compatibility with in-laws, or unspoken financial and emotional expectations. Men, on the other hand, may feel misunderstood or burdened by unclear expectations and adjustments they didn’t anticipate. Depression can also arise from the realization that you’ll be with the same person forever, shifts in social circles, work stress, or simply a lack of deep understanding before tying the knot,” explained Ankita Kaul. Also read | 7 ways to support and help your partner through depression

Tips to manage and prevent post-marriage depression:

Set clear boundaries before marriage: It’s crucial to discuss finances, emotional and physical needs, and responsibilities, rather than just focusing on wedding details.

Understand each other’s perspectives: Reaching common ground early builds a strong foundation.

Set both individual and joint goals: Growth should happen as individuals and as a couple. Shared activities and aspirations (beyond just having children) help deepen the bond.

Talk about deal breakers and boundaries: Clarity on non-negotiables and areas of flexibility promotes mutual respect.

Learn each other’s conflict styles: Healthy communication is key. Knowing how each partner handles conflict helps avoid misunderstandings.

Prioritise quality time: Even with busy lives, taking time to go on dates and be emotionally vulnerable strengthens the relationship. Also read | Breakup Day 2023: 8 effective tips to deal with post-breakup depression

Note to readers: This article is for informational purposes only and not a substitute for professional medical advice. Always seek the advice of your doctor with any questions about a medical condition.