Spectator by Seema Goswami: Be the last guest dancing
We get it, weddings are exhausting, even if you’re just a guest. Here’s how to keep the heart full and the events manageable
I know that it is fashionable among certain quarters to scoff at the Great Indian Wedding. So many functions, so many outfit changes, so much jewellery, and so many kinds of cuisines laid out for the delectation of the guests. Not to mention that it costs so much money — the kind that many people can’t afford and go bankrupt as they pretend that they do.
All of this is probably true but if you are attending as a guest there is also so much fun to be had. I particularly enjoy people-watching, gawking at the outfits and jewels on display, marvelling at the inventive decor, and of course, stuffing my face at the buffet tables.
But much as I enjoy playing dress-up and attending weddings, there is no denying that they can be a tiring business even if you are not the bride or groom (or the immediate family). So, as the wedding season looms large, here are some tips on how to survive it without losing your mind, wrecking your body and emptying your bank balance.
Choose your invitations wisely. If a wedding has four or five functions, there is no obligation to attend each and every one (unless the wedding is hosted by close family). So pick a function or two, where the guest list is smaller than the others — think mehendi rather than reception — and make your appearance there. Trust me, the hosts won’t even notice your absence at an event where they have invited thousands.
Don’t be afraid to recycle your outfits. Just because you remember that you wore that lehenga to your first cousin’s wedding three years ago doesn’t mean that anyone else does. In fact, you would be surprised how little people remember of what you wore to weddings over the years. So, don’t be shy to re-wear your favourite outfits. And that goes for jewellery as well.
If you must have new outfits then the environmentally sound choice is, of course, to rent rather than buy. This trend has taken off in the West but it is still to establish itself properly in India. But there are some rental sites that you can use. Try their services in advance to make sure they won’t let you down on the nights in question.
If renting doesn’t ring your bell, then form a little group with your girlfriends and cousins who are roughly the same size and have the same taste. And when your wedding invites don’t overlap, borrow each other’s stuff and go forth in completely new outfits and jewellery at zero cost with nobody being any the wiser.
Invest in a pair of comfortable platform shoes with not too high a heel. This is a crucial purchase that will take you through the wedding season without wrecking your knees and back. And as a bonus, you will be able to dance the night away with no pain.
And — I can’t stress this enough — eat a small, healthy snack before you head out to join the festivities. Not only is it a bad idea to drink on an empty stomach, it will also make it easy to resist the temptation of all those deep-fried canapés!
From HT Brunch, March 08, 2025
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