It’s the day to Aika to the Baika

Today is supposed to be Women’s Day, a token to assure (urban) women that despite the continued presence of everyday sexism, they are highly-valued; so could they please help the flailing economy by availing the offers and discounts being dangled before them?

In the middle of all this is Aika to the Baika (Listen to the Woman) – part short film; part music video; altogether fabulous.

One of the first women we see in Aika to the Baika is Inspector Kunti G – writer of complaints; supplier of sections of the Indian Penal Code (to complainants) and sunglasses (to Inspector Bilkul Pandey). When a woman wants to report her husband for domestic abuse, Kunti G agrees with her male colleague Bilkul Pandey that it’s a private, rather than police, matter. Another woman comes to the station, saying her ex-boyfriend molested her. Pandey dismisses her as a “hi-fi chick” and tells her to stop overreacting. After all, it’s not as though she was raped.

If it wasn’t for the complainants wearing sparkling outfits and the singing cops, this eight-minute lavani performance would be the stuff of real-life nightmares, but trust director Paromita Vohra to find a way to make gender bias and hypocrisy fun.

Aika to the Baika is the latest music video for Vohra’s digital sex education project Agents of Ishq. Previous hits include Love in the Garden of Consent, Main Aur Meri Body and The Amorous Adventures of Shakku and Megha (all freely available on YouTube). Vohra has a gift for packaging complex ideas in kitsch and catchy tunes, making them entertaining and accessible. It helps that Vohra is very funny while being very feminist.

Filing a complaint at a police station is hardly enjoyable in real life, but Aika to the Baika is set in a world where complainants are covered in bling rather than bruises. The thana has fairy lights and on the walls are wanted notices for criminals who look remarkably like Vohra and music director Bappi Lahiri (the latter is wanted for chain-snatching). Sure the cops are misogynists, but they’ve also got cute dance moves.

The beauty of Aika to the Baika is that for all its jingling wit and jangling choreography, it doesn’t sugarcoat the fact that once inside the police station, you’re at the police’s mercy. One woman protests when she’s portrayed as a victim by the police who ignore the fact that she and her boyfriend are in a consensual relationship. “He burnt my arms with hot oil,” another woman complains. “That happens all the time while cooking,” declares Bilkul Pandey. For all the chants of “Jai Naari!” (long live women) in the end, Aika to the Baika doesn’t let you forget how difficult it is for someone to approach the police with a complaint.

Last week, Mumbai Police’s new commissioner Param Bir Singh directed police stations in the city to set up welcome desks with women constables who would be responsible for guiding those coming to file complaints. “When the public approach the police station, they should feel that they are welcome and we, as members of the police force, must be genuinely concerned about the issues faced by them,” Singh told HT.

We can only hope that someone sends Aika to the Baika to Singh. Who knows? If he likes it, maybe the next time you walk into a thana, the constable at the welcome desk will say “Jai Naari!”