Spice of Life: Today’s loser is tomorrow’s winner, keep the spirit alive

One morning, turning over the page of a newspaper landed a glossy pamphlet of a coaching centre on my palm in which photographs of students, all smiles, were printed along with the coveted all-India rank (AIR) they’d secured in the entrance exam. No sooner had my mind silently conveyed well-deserved congratulations to the achievers than my heart began feeling for the majority of students who couldn’t make to the list of toppers. To succeed amid cut-throat competition at any cost unfortunately doesn’t teach us to accept failure let alone matching the zeal with which we celebrate success.

When hard work put in for years is paid off with the result, it becomes a moment of celebration. Nevertheless, failures too command celebration in a deep rational sense even if not to the same but to some degree for highlighting our shortcomings that are needed to be rectified before the next attempt. Losers need attention even more than winners as they often remain in dire need of a compassionate hand to wipe off tears of disappointment; a reliable shoulder to count on; a concerned well-wisher to counsel and help them perk up their wilting willpower. Adopting offbeat methods, such as offering sweets, treats and gifts or taking them along for a family outing despite the failure may lighten the mental baggage, channelising pent-up emotions in the right direction.

Performers reach the pinnacle only after tasting a series of losses and so do undisputed bosses in entrepreneurship, sports, politics, or art. Writer George Moore’s saying is apt: “A winner is just a loser who had tried one more time.” So, why are embarrassment, mockery, and societal stigma associated with failure? Scores of netizens proudly share their achievements, trivial or magnificent, on social media. Rarely do we read a post by a person publicly spelling out their failures. In this context, teachers and parents could play a constructive role in shaping children in a well-rounded way. Pumping their maximum efforts to ensure their children emerge frontrunners, it becomes equally imperative for them to invest significant time in their mental conditioning to cope with the unwelcoming tag of an “also-ran” in case their efforts don’t translate into a win.

To accept criticism and take appreciation in one’s stride is an art of living. My experience is that losers possess humane traits to initiate a positive conversation, promote cooperation over competition, and personify equality and ironically have lesser space in their ridiculed domains for a sense of superiority to gain ground. My purple patch during student days would get me closer to brilliant minds, their noses in haughty air, pulling out all stops to assume academic kingship that knew no kinship. On the flip side, my low rankings relegated me into the company of unsung minds with empathetic hearts who’d welcome me with open arms and find quirky ways to cheer me up.

Impartial inclusivity, equanimity, and all-embracing spirit are what society should perpetually be in the pursuit of to be labelled ideal in the real sense. It works wonders to genuinely appreciate a loser, telling them how good they are and how somehow they just remained behind in number game. To be in the losing zone doesn’t make them lesser humans in any way. Today’s loser is tomorrow’s winner provided the get-up-and-go spirit is kept alive, particularly by those around, reminding that, “You’re neither born a winner nor a loser. You’re born a chooser.” In this way, the world of losers is very likely to become a far better place to survive and thrive, and it’s a separate matter whether one wins or loses henceforth.

vijaybudhwar.endocrinologist@gmail.com

(The writer is a Pathankot-based endocrinologist)